What to do when you need a break from baby?

You have been given good advise on how to take care of your mental health, so I won't.

You happen to have had a baby at what is possibly he worst time due to covid restrictions. No wonder you feel the way you do. I would too!

Being a new mom has got to be the biggest adjustment in a woman's life. Then, not having a support system makes things even more stressful. Believe it or not, those feelings are normal. They are. But, it is temporary because as each day passes, things are leaning toward changes in your life.

See if you can find a local facebook group for new moms. There you will be among people who you share alot in common, where you can make friends and build a support system. Sharing your feelings with others will help you realize you are not alone and can collaborate with others to share ideas and come up with solutions to everyday challenges. Your pediatrician may know of mom support groups, ask him/her during your next visit.

Once covid restriction are lifted, get in touch with your local community center and the library. Typically they will have programs for " Mommy and Me" where your child can meet other kids and you can meet other moms. The library may have a story book program as well. At first, the objective is to get out of the house to breakup staying at home to socialize. Making friends is the next natural step. With warmer weather on the way, you can visit a local park and even go to some town sponsored events to get out of the house with your child.

Our highschool had a childcare and development program for the students who took in toddlers for 3 hours 3 days a week. I know your child maybe too you to participate in a program like that, but keep it in mind for the future to give yourself a break!

Time changes everything. It does. You'll see.

About your family... it is hard for people to relate to very young children. But, as children grow, they become more and more inquisitive and relatable. That's typically when family begins to share and teach their interests to young children. So, please. although I know it's hard now, especially when you need them the most, your family WILL come around and eventually be more involved. They will.

And, don't lose hope over his family coming around. In the mean while, don't push your child on them because that is just a recipe to be rejected and hurt. Instead, be a better person than they are. Why not take a series of adorable photos of the baby and send them via the post office. Give them something tangible every few months so they can see their grandchild's development.

I do hope you are going to take the baby daddy to court for child support. Your baby deserves that !

As each day unfolds, you will see less of a shadow and umore of the sun. I promise. Don't lose hope!

You are in an extremely difficult situation, but things aren't that bleak. At 9 months, your baby is settling down in to regular routines. Create routine for her where she takes a nap during mid-day or afternoon. That will give you a couple of hours of peace and quiet - yes, you won't be able to go out or anything, but if you don't have many friends, there aren't that many reasons to go out anyway. It will take about 2 weeks to get the baby trained to a routine. She may resist at first, but be gentle and patient with her, and she will settle down.

When she is awake, plan out activities with her. When you are cooking, place her on a high-chair so that she can see what you are doing, and also tell her what you are doing, eg. "Look, baby, I am peeling carrots." Don't use baby-talk - talk to her as you would to a friend. It will come out more natural and feel easier that way. Babies get fussy when they are bored. Talking to them is a great way to keep them occupied, and also for you to form that bond that PPD robbed you of.

Creating and following a routine is good for your baby, and good for your PPD. One thought that torments mothers with PPD is the feeling of "this is never going to end." With a routine, that feeling of anxiety can be controlled, because "there are times when it ends." With a proper daily routine, you are back in control.

During those breaks that you create for yourself, you need to plan some activities. For each day, plan something different - watch a TV series, do yoga, meditate, read.

Your partner and your family have let you down. But don't dwell on it, nor think about it. You are strong, and you don't need them. You can do this.

Do you have any neighbors with children, who you trust, who would take her for an hour or two? Or maybe a church nursery? Any friends who could give you a little break, just by coming into the house and watching her while you take a nap or something, so you'd be right there if they needed you but you could get some rest? Do you have the money to hire a mother's helper? That's someone who basically "babysits" your child in the home while you're still there, but takes the pressure off of you so you can nap, take a hot bath, get some work done, etc. Having a baby is SO difficult, it's really not something we were meant to do alone. Why does your family "refuse" to help? Your own mother? Have you told her that you have ppd and need her help? I can't imagine turning down the opportunity to help my daughter or be with my grandchild. wth

Drop-in daycares exist, and they cost about what your typical babysitter would charge. You should also start looking for a regular daycare now so that you can get on a waitlist in time for when you return to work.

Find an experienced babysitter with good references.

Check around in your area for a "mom's day out" program.  If you're in a bigger city, it's likely that some of the churches will have such a program.  Call some of the day care centers in your community and inquire if they'll keep your daughter one day a week for you to do "mommy things".  Also, take that POS baby daddy to court and get some child support from him.  And get some help for your mental health issues.  It's nothing to be ashamed of.

Do you have any daycare options?

First, you need to see your OB-Gyn about your PPD.  You should be prescribed meds for that.  You can take the baby with you.  I see mothers with their babies at my gynecologist's office all the time.

You should really see a therapist, too, but that could be hard to arrange if you don't have anyone to watch the child, unless perhaps you could do it online. Look into that. Your OB-Gyn might be able to recommend someone.  Your doctor will understand PPD, and so will a therapist.

Since you don't work, what about joining some kind of Mother and Baby group?  You could meet some people and maybe find someone who'd agree to exchange childcare with you, so you could get a few hours to yourself.

Finally, if you have no friends and family where you live, and since you don't have a job there, what about moving?  At least if you were closer to friends and family, you might feel better.

Good luck.