Are my friend's parents too strict?

Question

They are so strict! She is a japanese-korean-norwegian(Mum Japanese norwegian and Dad is Korean) girl who sits next to me in class and we have a friendly relationship. today I asked her about her parents at home and she has such strict parents! here are the rules and timetable(which she memorised and i managed to get most of it)
Wakes up at 6am every morning to prepare breakfast for her parents and her 
Must greet her parents at their bedroom door every morning and invite them to have breakfast.
Not allowed to Sit unless parents do first and ask her to.
Not allowed to eat unless parents do first.
Must polish up her plate.
Must greet whenever she sees her parents in a very formal manner.
Must bow then kneel whenever asking parents.
Always speak in a formal manner.
Must get straight As in every test.
She has piano and harp lessons and must do well in those too.
Never allowed out of the house unless with parents.
She prepares all the meals and cleans the house. If she disobeys anything she get caned! Are they far too strict on her?

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Yes, a woman wrote a book about it. She calls herself a "tiger mom".  But this is one of the reasons Asian kids succeed so well. I have a couple of friends with Korean parents. They are very successful- but also a little screwed up. There should be a balance between the things you list (some of which were standard when I was growing up, such as eating whatever was put in front of you and cleaning your plate) and the curret American approach, where parents are afraid of their kids. 
Except for the caning, none of this is abusive. However- if one of your teachers sees evidence of the caning, they may very well call social services- and it wouldn't be a bad thing if the parents were told that this is not acceptable in the U.S.

TomTom · Answer

'She prepares all the meals and cleans the house' and than they expect her to get straight A's in all her tests
What do her parents sit around doing nothing all day while her daughter some home cooks, cleans and studies at the same time

They need to lighten up a little
The world would not be a better place if everyone's parents were like that
It would be way too stressful and not enjoyable, until you had children of your own to wait on you hand and foot

? · Answer

In their customs no. In Asia(full of the best parenting) they make sure their children are well be halved. Her friend will come out much better than some person who lets their children run wild and get arrested for selling drugs

? · Answer

This sounds like a cultural issue. So it's best not to be ethnocentric.

Frankly I think she is 1000 times in a better place than kids with parents who are too permissive and don't teach them responsibilities or how to behave respectfully. Look at all the kids who are spoiled, rude, bullying, overweight, lazy, spend their days playing video games and worrying about shallow things.  Parents are erratic, or neglectful, putting Facebook and tv before parenting. These are the kids I feel bad for.

Anonymous · Answer

poor kid, straight a's and such isnt tr problem, its the exaggerated formalness.

Jenna · Answer

The world would be such a better place if ALL parents were like that.

I guarantee she'll be more successful in life than you.

? · Answer

Yes but in Asia this is how they discipline children

Are my friend's parents too strict?

7 Answers