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why did I just tell her I'm fine?
My psychologist just phoned as we had made arrangements for this week. She was meant to call yesterday - when she forgot to it ended up in me cutting myself reasonably severely & contacting the acute care team last night but hanging up rather than saying anything.
Yet when she apologised I told her it was fine (even when she admitted it was because she forgot) even though it wasn't ok. She knows that I am in a particularly bad place right now which is why we had the phone appt between our weekly appointments.
I had just stopped cutting again when she called, yet told her everything was ok. Now I have to go to my last DBT group session, confirmed with her that yes I would be gong but I just want to crawl in a ball & never have to face the world again.
Why when I'm feeling like that did I make out that things are as ok at they were at my last appt when they aren't. It is completely out of character for me to hide things from her now.
2 Answers
- 1 decade agoFavourite answer
Maybe you think somehow you are disturbing her and you feel quilty but you should not. She is meant to be there for you every time you need because it is so important. You have to trust her every time. Telling the pain you feel and what you do to a person you can trust will discharge half of it even the situation with your job wont change so fast.
I want to tell you something very important. Everybody deserves and needs love no matter what. Every living creature even plants must be loved and respected so much ,much more a human being no matter what mistakes that human being has made in her life or towards who she made mistakes ,needs and deserves love. Love is the food for our life . Webasicallyy need material food but if we don t have emotional food too we die. It is a rule foreveryonee. So please receive anything you can get.
Do not think you are desturbing her.It is about your life wich is too important. I am sure she thinks like that too so you must think the same.
I wish I tell you that I care but...I don t think you would believe me. Have a peacefull day as possible.
- 1 decade ago
You probably told her you were fine because you don't want to admit that you relapsed. You also might be afraid of driving her away by telling her it was her fault (you shouldn't be; it's her job to help you). You should tell her you relapsed and cut yourself again, though you don't have to tell her it was because she didn't call if you don't want to. The only way to get better is to come clean to your psychologist.
