Need help and advice with my four year old son?

There is no turning back. his life has just been interupted by the baby and now he is not the center of attention. His behavior is quit normal and you are doing a great job trying to spend alone time with him also. Have you started talking to him about all the wonderful things he can do that his new baby can't do? Also when the baby does something remind him that he was a baby once and how cute it was when he did this or that, whatever the baby might be doing at this time. When you sit and hold the baby tell baby how lucky he is to have such a wonderful big brother. This is normal and everyone will be just fine, hang in there.

What he is going through is normal. Up until now he lived in a bubble of love where he had all your attention just for him. Now you bring another child home who you have to hold and cuddle and pay attention to practically all the time and you expect him to be OK with that? Put yourself in his shoes, his life has just been turned upside down and he does not know how to deal with it. The exact same thing happened to me when I had my second child but worst, because my eldest was already 6 when her sister was born so she had a lot more "mommy" time by herself. She had tantrums, she would run out of the room saying "you dont love me anymore!" everytime I would hold the baby etc. No matter what I did, it was not good enough, in fact, the harder I tried, the more she seemed to pull away, almost punishing me. With her sister she was great, she loved her from the moment she saw her. All her anger was directed at me because I am the one who betrayed her by bringing someone else into the picture.

So believe me I have been there. And it will get better, much better. Just keep doing what you are doing. Whatever routines you had with your son before, try very hard to keep them so he feels that things for him dont have to change just because you have another kid. Stay consistent and try to act normal like you did before the baby. Kids can sense your guilt and by going out of your way to give him extra attention you are confirming in his mind that thing are not well and he will act out more. With my daughter I stopped chasing her all the time to make things better and I simply started to treat her like I always did. I kissed her, I hugged her and I asked her how her day was and did things with her as usual. If she threw a tantrum, I would simple say "I'm sorry you feel that way but it is simply not true and I have enough love for both of you" Eventually, she came around and started being herself again. Don't feel bad because you have done nothing wrong, at the contrary you have given him a friend for life. Soon he will come around.

My daughters are now 9 and 3 and the adore each other. The little one wants to be just like her big sister and the big one treats her little sister like her own real doll.

Best of luck

Oh. I went through this also with my son. He liked him at first then about 6weeks out he got so mean with the baby. Mean to me also. Its hard to get onto them since your know they are not feeling like the baby anymore. I just kept at it, you want to feed him, change him, pick out his clothes. Talked to him about the baby..why do you think he is crying? Does he need a bottle? Why cant he have a hot dog (no teeth) Then Id say Logan has teeth...you once didnt have teeth either. I showed him pics when he was a baby. I didnt get on to him for acting like a baby. He started to cry like the baby and climb into his chairs. I just said you being a baby? You want me to cuddle you, carry you to bed like a baby, ect. Just to let him know he was still going to be my baby even though there was another one in the house.

It took a good 4-5months and now he likes him and wants to get him out from bed with me, tells me when he crys or what he needs, tells me he is too little. Also once the baby starts doing stuff he may change too. Once my baby started to look at and laugh at my older son he LOVED that the baby likes to look at him and grab him.

Yes, times he still gets mean with him but most of the time he likes and is good with him now. Just be patient and reasure your older just because baby is here doesnt mean you love him less and tell him you miss him and wish he wasnt mad/mean to you. I also called the baby by his name rather then "the baby"

My neighbor went through the same with her two boys it lasted 7-8months.

oooo when i was younger and if i was in his situation my mom would have given me a nice beat to the bum but im youngest kid so w/e

it may be time for some eleemosynary chastisement. or at least a time out.

Get a Wooden spoon ;-)